My friend Tricia called me today and told me she saw me on the Dr. Phil show! haha! I was in the audience with my mom. I took my mom when she was in town because I thought it would be something fun to do. Turns out it was the most boring topic!! We were so ticked off but we still had fun.
Here’s a picture my friend took of her TV of me!
LA’s weather is about as weird as some of the people living here! Last week we had a heat wave and this week I’m freezing my tail off! What the heck is going on? Anyway, the cold weather isnt bad as long as I dress correctly for it. I woke up today and went outside to walk the dogs and it was in the 40’s!! My poor dogs! I got their hair shaved and now they are shivering like crazy.
I woke up early and popped right out of bed and put on my cardio stuff. I did it outside in the cold on my machine and actually wore 3 sweatshirts. I ended up taking one off because I did interval training and things got pretty heated pretty quickly. I did 60 min and kept my heartrate up in 165-175 range. Awesome workout! I’m really working on my conditioning and it seems like its only getting better each session. Great!
Today I train legs and I cant wait. I love legs. I love all training. There isnt one workout I dont like. Each muscle group is fun to train. We did back yesterday and did deadlifts. I really like deadlifts. The regular and the straight leg ones. But for regular I got 185lbs. One week ago I got 165lbs. nice little jump, huh??
I’m going to look back in my old training logs from Florida and see what I used to deadlift and bench press and shoulder press. Should be interesting to see. Then I’m going to make some new goals for myself.
I havent been on the scale. I’m kinda scared to get on. I think I’ll wait a while and not worry about the scale right now. I’m just going to train HARD, Diet HARD and do my cardio and let things happen. I am aiming to be in awesome shape by Feb. If I make those shows, Great… if not, I’ll pick another… but the goal is the SAME… LEAN LEAN LEAN…. and stay POSITIVE!!
Ok, I have some things to do before training tonight… See ya later 
DL
I GOT MY FIRE BACK!! I FOUND MY FIRE!! FINALLY!! Oh man, this feels good. I didnt know what it would finally take but something FINALLY snapped today and I’m feeling good! I actually finally had a great talk with Pauline about what’s been holding me back. Its been my diet. Its been the one thing that has really been holding me back. The fact of the matter is I MUST be strict with my diet and in my mind I just was miserable about it. It pretty much goes back to “wanting what you cant have” and me just feeling so locked in and rebelling. Well, guess what. THATS RUBBISH!! Finally today Pauline said, well, we can put in cheat meals for you or add in more carbs, ect, ect… and at that moment I felt like such a slacker. I felt awful. I KNOW I can do this training and diet and I have been acting like I cant. I have been holding myself back. The bottom line is, YOU ARE WHAT YOU EAT. If I eat like crap, I LOOK LIKE CRAP! Plain and simple. I CAN NOT EAT CRAP. I MUST STAY FOCUSED and DO THIS! At that moment I felt like Pauline was having doubts in me that I could do this. I felt like she started feeling like I just dont have what it takes… and you know what… THATS RUBBISH TOO!! I HAVE WHAT IT TAKES AND I CAN DO THIS!! The first show I did I was driven so hard because I knew people doubted that I could. I wanted to show everyone FINALLY that I’m not full of talk and hot air. Well, once again I’m feeling challenged and I’m ready to face that challenge and show MYSELF and everyone else that I can do WHATEVER I put my mind to.
I’m sick of being down about doing something I love. I MUST pull myself together and accomplish what I have set out to do!! I’m ready!! I’m ready for this!!
As far as what show I’m doing… I have to think about that. If I do the Steel Rose thats in 12 weeks and that would mean I would have to lose 2lbs a week. I dont know if thats going to happen. Plus, I dont want to rebound again. I need to do this the smart way. So I’m thinking I’ll do a show in March or April. Honestly, the show is a bonus. Getting my body into shape is #1 to me right now. Getting my mind under control is the key to accomplishing ANYTHING I want!
I’m so sorry to all of you who read this journal and have had to read about my low points. I know that isnt so motivational but its real and truthful. Now I’m finally back in a better place and I hope you stick around to see where this can take me 
Have a great night! I know I will!
DL
Good evening! Just wanted to check in and say hello. Today was a good day. I woke up feeling a lot better and my nose is not stuffed up as much anymore. It was pouring rain today in the morning which was kind of nice because that means I dont have to water my flowers. I dont have a yard so I plant all my flowers in big pots. When I went to Aspen this summer they had such pretty wild flowers planted all over and I just loved them so I decided I wanted my own wild flowers. I planted them in big pots on my decks and they are blooming like CRAZY! I have flowers pouring out in every direction! I planted them from little seeds in high quality soil and watered them everyday. It took a lot of time and patience but now they are amazing. Its kind of like me… I must be patient and keep training hard and before I know it I’ll be where I want to be! Like a flower! haha!
So today I started the day with 60 min of cardio in the morning. Then later in the afternoon I trained Shoulders and abs and then finished the workout with another 30 min of cardio. I could have done more cardio because I had the energy but I dont want to burn myself out this week. My hamstrings are still sore but not as bad as yesterday. Yesterday they hurt if I even touched them.
I’m really working on taking it day by day with my training and dieting. The training for me is the fun part. The cardio isnt even bad. I actually like it for the most part. Its the diet thats the hardest right now. I’m just being honest. Dieting is hard for me. I love food. I mean, I really LOVE food and sometimes eating so clean just gets plain BORING and leaves me unsatisfied. I used to not have a problem eating the same things all the time but lately I just get these cravings for things. Most of the time I dont give in but sometimes I do…I know, I need to work on that! Hey, I’m just being honest here!
Alright, time to eat again and get some laundry done. I seem to be running out of socks…
Have a great night!
DL
Well its the end of the long holiday weekend and I’m sick! yuck! I hate being sick. I am all stuffed up and blowing my nose like crazy. I woke up sick yesterday and it got even worse today. I decided to not do anything today. I actually stayed in my sweats and slippers all day and rested. It seems to me that when I dont rest when I’m sick, I end up getting worse!
My legs are SO SORE from my leg workout on Friday. My hamstrings have never been so sore. It hurts to walk or even touch them! Maybe it was good I rested today.
Lately my motivation has been up and down. I have good days and bad days but I’m really finding it hard to grab on, stay focused and just go for it again. I dont know why. I dont know whats holding me back. I miss having that huge drive in me to go for my goal. Its so hard to find it right now but I cant give up. Its just so hard to get that fire back. I cant dwell on the reasons I just have to keep going and keep working to find what I’m looking for.
Tomorrow is a fresh week. I sure hope I wake up feeling better because doing cardio with your nose clogged and your eyes watering isnt fun at all!
Well hello hello!! Its Black Friday and NO WAY am I going shopping today! I dont even know why people bother shopping today just knowing how crazy it is. Traffic and parking alone drive me up the wall. Now a days I feel like shopping online for things is way easier! However, if your like me, someone who wants the items NOW, its hard to wait for the things to show up in the mail. But on the other hand, sometimes its fun when you order something, kinda forget you ordered it and it shows up and then BAM, instant present! haha!
So yesterday was Thanksgiving and WHAT FUN IT WAS!! We had a blast here at the house! Tons of friends came over from early in the day until late into the night. We had about 15 people here and it was great. Thats why I love holidays. Its always so much fun to bring friends and family together for a day together to relax and laugh and of course this house was FILLED with food. Our friend did all the cooking and my kitchen was a MESS! I didnt even care though because everyone was having so much fun. I set the table so pretty and all of us smooshed around it. It was like a huge family! I dont think I have ever seen so many people drinking so much wine before. We had about 20 empty wine bottles. I dont drink so I think I was one of the only sober people there. By the end of the night everyone’s mouths were red and purple from all the red wine.
So today I have been cleaning up and I’m about to do some cardio. I took yesterday off from training and cardio and even ate some “forbidden” foods but thats ok. I’m not upset about it one drop. I had such a wonderful time and enjoyed myself and today is a new day. I’m not getting down on myself anymore for not being perfect. Life is too short to live that way and not enjoy yourself. I refuse to look back when I’m 80 years old and think, “did it really matter how lean I was? Why didnt I just relax sometimes and have some fun?” Because honestly, no one but ME cares! People might think, Wow, she has a great body, maybe give me compliment here and there but at the end of the day, THEY DONT CARE WHAT I LOOK LIKE!! They go about their day and their lives and I’m the one ALWAYS on cardio and on a diet!! Ugh!! There is a time for everything and Thanksgiving was a time to relax and enjoy myself and thats what I did!
Now I’ll try posting some pictures from the day… I just learned how to post pictures so I’m very excited!
not a creature is stirring, not even a mouse… and boy oh boy have my Thanksgiving plans changed quite a bit!! We were going to go over to a friends house to celebrate with about 10-15 friends but then the guy who’s house we were going to got sick and well…. some how I have ended up with everyone coming to my house! I dont mind. I’m actually excited. It will be nice to have lots of friends here ALL day tomorrow. Our friend is making all the food and is getting here at 8am to start cooking. Then more people here by 10am for football games and food and fun! I prepared some stuffed mushrooms and cookies for everyone and my other friends are making some dishes and bringing them. It should be a fun day!
Today in LA the traffic was CRAZY!! Jay and I couldnt believe the mess on the roads everywhere. I was going to go down to Venice to train but found out there was a chemical spill and with the already heavy traffic due to the holidays and the chemical spill, the traffic wasnt moving for miles and miles. So I wont train until Friday and good thing because if I drove in that mess today I would have been crying.
So for turkey day I plan to get up early and do some cardio. My friends will be here but they are all fine doing their own things and with all the cooking and football going on no one will even notice I’m missing for a bit. I wish the weather was a bit cooler here because we have been having some what of a heatwave and it just doesnt seem like the holidays with warm weather!
Well, I’m off to bed… HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE… well, to all the Americans who celebrate at least
Ahhhh… it feels so good to be back thinking positive again and feeling focused! Now I have had three great training days in a row and tomorrow we will finish up with legs. Then I have off from training until monday. I have really been having great lifting sessions. My back is so tight and sore all the time so finally after my training and cardio tonight I bought an S hook. A new toy!! I love it so much already and I have barely owned it for 5 min. I even used it on the drive home from Venice tonight. Its a plastic S shaped hook that lets you work out knots and tight spots in your back and neck. I just love it. I’m never going to be without it again! Its like getting a massage all the time. My traps are so tight so this is going to be amazing for me to have.
Tonight was chest and triceps. We did bench press and incline bench and then some dips and close grip presses. After we trained I hoped on cardio. I didnt do any thing morning (which is SO rare) since I had to get to the DMV, the bank and a million other places. So I was trying to do a little more to make up for it and Pauline came up to me and told me to stop. She was angry with me because she wanted me to lay low with the cardio this week. Ugh!!! I had the energy so I wanted to do it! Good thing I already burned 700 cals by the time she caught me! hee hee I had figured I would taper it off as the week progressed and as I became more tired. Whatever. Its ok with me to stop
Well, its time to make some dinner and play with my new S hook. I have a feeling this is going to be a very good little investment I have made!
DL
Alright, I’m back on track and feeling much more positive now! I’m sitting here enjoying a nice dinner of cabbage and fish. Its actually pretty good. I like all the dieting food a lot… (I just sometimes miss the other foods) I’m not gonna lie. I’m an EATER. I love to eat… and not just the “good” foods. I have NEVER EVER been a calorie restricter. Thats one thing I would bet my life on… I could NEVER have an eating disorder where I dont eat. NEVER!! I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE food too much!! Thats why I mostly dont mind staying on track and eating healthy because I get to eat lots of veggies… and I love veggies!
Anyway, I had a really great, strong Back and Calve workout tonight. I finished up with a 30 min session of cardio. This week I’m NOT going to over due it with the cardio. I over trained last week. I did A LOT of cardio in the beginning and just burned myself out by the end of the week. Then I got SO tired that not only did my body hurt but my mind started to think crazy negative thoughts and that cant happen again. I must keep up a pace that I can keep up with and not just break myself down. I know thats the case because after two days of rest, I’m feeling great and positive again. What I must remember is that this isnt a short term thing. This is a lifestyle so it needs to be something I can keep up and be HAPPY doing not something I dread. The bottom line is, I love what I’m doing and I wouldnt change it for anything. So I must keep my head up and keep on truckin!!
Being negative isnt me… and I dont like it one bit when I am… It doesnt accomplish anything.
If I can get through this rocky time, weather the storm and get back to my lean body, I can do ANYTHING!!! I CAN DO IT!!
DL